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Why Do Women Stay in Abusive Relationships

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Over the past years, we have seen and heard cases of high-profile abuse. With the increase in the number of women reporting being harassed in a relationship, most people wonder why do women stay in abusive relationships?

There is the assumption that if a woman is in an abusive relationship, she has the power to end the abuse if she just leaves. We can’t count the number of times we’ve heard friends and family wonder “why doesn’t she just leave?” The question is better framed as “Why is she choosing to stay?” Sometimes it comes with the judgment “It’s her fault if she doesn’t” Below are some reasons why women stay in abusive relationships.

Reasons Why Women stay in abusive relationships

They hope the abuser will change one day – Some abusers use a caring and loving approach after every abusive episode to propitiate the victim. Also, if these women have invested a lot of time and effort in the
relationship, they live in the hope that eventually, all the pain will be worth the probable chance at happiness.

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They are afraid of their abuser –  Women stay in toxic relationships because they fear for their life or the life of their children because their abuser has threatened what he might do if she dares try to leave.

Women stay because they believe they have nowhere to go. They might not know how the community can support them or the local shelter might be full.

A woman might stay because she has a disability and is dependent on him for daily care.

Many women fear leaving their children alone with an abuser as joint custody is usually awarded. Additionally, they may fear losing custody of parental alienation

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Women stay because they blame themselves. Most women believe it’s their fault.

Fear of not being believed and that the justice system will not rule in their favor.


by Osafo Daniel
Twitter: @iamosafodaniel

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